Enabling is rescuing your loved ones so that they do not experience the painful consequences of their irresponsible decisions. This may feel like the helpful and natural thing for you to do, but it is only allowing them to continue their addictive behaviors. Enabling in this way, only keeps them blinded to the truth of their need for help.
- Tracy, the young mother of two boys, has mastered the art of manipulating her family into enabling her behavior. Often arrested on drug charges, she would say to her parents, “Do you want to see the mother of your grandchildren locked up in jail?” The last time it happened , the parents were planning to mortgage their home so they could afford the bail payment.
- Galatians 6:7-8 speaks to Christians about this with a simple but blunt truth. “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from that Spirit will reap eternal life.”(NIV)God’s Word is specific. Christians – don’t be deceived! Bad actions have painful consequences, even when our children or loved ones are involved. Thankfully, God can use those consequences for His purposes – if we don’t get in His way.
Am I Enabling My Teenage Boy?
Falling into enabling can be such a deceptive trap to fall into as a parent. While trying to make them happy or take away their pain, we can actually be contributing to their downfall. Do you struggle telling your troubled teen “no” when they become emotionally intense? Do you try to create peace by filling their desires? Are you allowing them to do things that might be a little out of the norm? Creating boundaries can be a solution to help you combat enabling.
Enabling can lead to and fuel addiction. If you are in need of some counsel on how to deal with counseling, we would love to hear about your situation and give you an assessment. Please reach out to us. If your son would benefit from life transformation while you learn more tools to prevent you from being an enabling parent, please contact us at www.ozarksteenchallenge.com.
